Those crazy Christians, I was gonna sleep in today

But the Church bells woke me up and they're a half a mile away

Those crazy Christians dressed up driving down my street

get their weekly dose of guilt before they head to Applebee's They pray before they eat and they pray before they snore

They pray before a football game and every time they score

Every untimely passing, every dear departed soul

Is just another good excuse to bake a casserole Those crazy Christians go and jump on some damn plane

Fly to Africa or Haiti, risk their lives in Jesus name

No they ain't the late night party kind

They curse the devils whiskey while they drink the saviors wine A famous TV preacher has a big affair and then one tearful

Confession and he's born again, again

Someone yells Hallelujah and they shout and clap and sing

Its like they can't wait to forgive someone for just about anything Those crazy Christians Instead of being outside on this sunny afternoon

By the bedside of a stranger in a cold hospital room

And every now and then they meet a poor lost soul like me

Whose not quite sure just who or what or how he ought to be

They march him down the aisle then the next thing that you know

They dunk him the water and here comes another one of those crazy Christians They look to Heaven their whole life

And I think what if they're wrong but what if they're right You know its funny, much as Im baffled by it all

If I ever really needed help, well you know who Id call

Is those crazy Christians