You know, I started reading books.Yay for reading, right?Yay, niggas that can read.Yes, make some noise.I read, you know, one of the books that a breakup put me on to was The Four Agreements.You guys familiar with it?The Four Agreements is a great damn book.The Four Agreements taught me a lot.Another thing I learned about, anybody know about the love languages, the five love languages?If you don't, please do.But if you don't, I will tell you.You have physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, gift giving and receiving, and quality time spent.That sounds really great, right?Should add that to your repertoire.But one thing I thought about, I really looked at it and I said, that don't just sound like five steps to making a relationship filled with love.That also sounds like five steps to some great ***, all right?If you really look at it, makes for great * ***, all right?Just really examine it, right?First of all, all *** starts with physical touch.Oh *, right there, keep it going.Words of affirmation.Hey, if you give each other a head, that's a hell of an act of service.You can give each other the gift and receive the gift of an orgasm.And I call that a quality time spent, right?Ain't that?Oh man, I know you guys are shocked.You guys are real shocked when I came on stage, but yes.I am black, all right?I get it.Johnny Garfield is indeed my name.I'm black with a white name.That's called privilege pending, motherfuckers.That's what that is.That is what that is, man.But I've been all around the world.I've been all around the world.Like I said, I've been to LA.I've been to New York.I've been in Miami.And I'll tell you something, the South is great.Believe it or not, the South is great.I talk about it.I talk about the South sometimes.I talk about the South because the government talks about the South.The government don't like the South, and if you pay attention, they have a lot of jokeson the South.Like, anybody here pay attention to their money, more specifically their quarters?You know how like every state has their own quarter?Do you guys know who's on the back of the Alabama state quarter?Nobody?Helen Keller.Yes.I didn't see that coming.Helen Keller is on the back of the Alabama state quarter.For those of you who don't know who Helen Keller is, Helen Keller is this white woman fromway back in the day when black people didn't have rights and *.She's from Alabama, and she could not hear or see.She could not hear or see.She was blind and deaf.And I thought them putting Helen Keller on the back of the Alabama quarter was very humorous.Because that's the government's way of saying, people down South ain't got all the sensein the world.Oh man, but yeah, like I said, I'm loving this comedy *, man.It's truly a gift.I'm so glad that y'all are sharing it with me, because I would get all kinds of likeadvice or suggestions on my comedy thing.Like I remember one time my uncle said, you know, you're doing comedy.Is this a hobby or is this a career choice?And I'm like, motherfucker, you're on your third divorce.Is love a hobby or is that?I don't know.I don't know.Family's tough.Family's tough.Life is tough.But I'm glad that y'all make this * easy by being open to laughing.Because laughter, like I say, is the healthiest thing you can do in the world.The healthiest thing you can do after *, that's what I'm going to do.That's what y'all should do more of.It's Friday.I'm Johnny * Garfield.Thanks for coming out.It's been a pleasure.We'll be right back.