Well, it was all I could do to keep from cryingSometimes it seems so useless to remainYou don't have to call me darlingDarlingYou can never even call me by my nameYou don't have to call me Waylon JenningsAnd you don't have to call me Charlie PrydeDarlingAnd you don't have to call me Merle HaggardAnymoreEven though you're on my fighting sideSo I'll hang around as long as you will let meAnd I'll never mind itStanding in the rainBut you don't have to call me darlingDarlingYou can never even call me by my nameWell, you know me and the Possum-Eating CowboysHave been playing this song for a long timeOut there on the roadIt's a touchy little Steve Goodman numberAbout trains, trucks, mamas, prison, and getting drunkSo anyway, me and the boys got togetherAnd we asked Mr. David Allen CoeAnd a few of our other heroesIf they wouldn't mind singing with usOn what has proven itself to beThe perfect country western songI was drunkThe day my mom got out of prisonAnd I went to pick her up in the rainBut before I could get to the stationIn my pickup truckShe got run over by a damned old trainSo I'll hang around as long as you will let meAnd I'll never mind itStanding in the rainBut you don't have to call me darlingDarlingYou can never even call meWell, I wonder why you don't call meWhy don't you ever call me by my name?By my nameBy my name