If I were a human being, I'd head straight for New Orleans And I'd blow this horn so hot and strong like no one they've ever seen You've heard of Louis Armstrong and Mr. Sidney Bechet All those boys gonna step aside when they hear this old ex-gator play, listen When I'm human, as I hope to be I'm gonna blow this horn till the cows come home And everyone's gonna bow down to me Thank you, thank you, I love you too, baby When I'm myself again, I want just the life I have A great big party every night, that doesn't sound too bad A redhead on my left arm, a brunette on my right A blonde or two to hold a candle, that seems just about right Hey Louis, life is short, when you're done, you're done We're on this earth to have some fun, and that's the way things are When I'm human, and I'm gonna be I'm gonna tear it up like I did before, that's a royal guarantee Your modesty becomes you, and your sense of responsibility I've worked hard for everything I've got, and that's the way it's supposed to be When I'm a human being, at least I'll act like one If you do your best each and every day, good things are sure to come your way What you give is what you get, my daddy said that and I'll never forget And I commend it to you When we're human, and we're gonna be I'm gonna blow my horn, I'm gonna live the high life I'm gonna do my best to take my place in the sun When we're human When we're human