When I was just knee-high to a puddle duck
Santa Claus brought me a little toy truck
And I drove ten thousand miles in our front yard
Our front yard
Well, I said right then, when I get grown
I'll have me a big truck on my own
And I made it too, but boys, it's mighty hard
Plane dodging scales to make up time
Getting caught ten times out of nine
This 18-wheeler, she's making a wreck out of me
I got tickets from all the best towns around
And when I made the terminal today I found
Some smart jokers done got my seniority
Boom, boom, boom
My little lady and the union
They're just alike about changing their minds
And I'm going on strike
And the worry I do about them
Ain't no fun
Well, I was headed home from Portland, Maine
When the union started having labor pains
Daggling, she didn't too
And now I've got a son
But I'll bet you one thing that kid of mine
Won't ever get at Christmas time
It's a little toy truck like Santa Claus brought to me
And if he ever mentions having one around
I'll tan his little hide
Till he can't see me
Sit down
No more gear jammers in this here family
No, sir
I want that boy to get him an easy job
You know, like, after all, he could be president
Or town ambassador to Music City, USA
Or governor
Secretary of State
Anything
But me, right now, I'm gonna park this rig and get a cup of coffee
Oh, my back, sir
Oh, my back, sir
Oh, my back, sir