Mother,
I can't stand animal lovers.
* animals!
They're the, they're the hunt and eat.
Kill, mount, wear,
poke with a stick,
molest with a stick through the fence.
College students like that.
Every year there's a college student
who wants to * a pig with a broom handle through the fence.
College students are *.
I don't know what the * they're going.
Yeah, I'm going to send my kid to college
so he can become a * *.
They're animals.
Save the dolphin, save the dolphin.
He's so incredibly intelligent.
If the dolphin is so smart,
how come he keeps swimming
into the * net?
I got a goldfish tank at home.
I put the net in there,
that fish goes like a son of a *.
You want to save a smart fish?
Save my goldfish.
You audience,
you people suck right now.
From here over, I like you.
You,
why the * did you come out of the house?
You're like Morris the * cat.
You Latinos,
you're okay.
I'm up to here with this Tiger Woods motherfucker.
I don't know if anybody else is either.
I've had enough of this character witness.
What's fun is it when the same guy wins every time.
Now somebody needs to run him over with a
* golf cart and break his * head.
Selling Buicks,
you never see him coming out of a hotel.
You never see him coming anywhere.
You never see him anywhere.
He's corporate.
He's a madman.
Selling Buicks.
When's the last time somebody told you they bought a Buick?
Granddad bought a Buick about 40 years ago.
It's under the cover in the * garage.
He's got so much money,
he can make up his own nationale.
What the * is he making up?
Wouldn't it be great to be able to heckle the
golfers like you do the other sports figures?
Basketball, you're allowed to
put the balloons, you know?
Come on,
act like you know what the * planet you're from!
Football,
it gets so loud sometimes the quarterback has to
take his hands from the gay man's ass and say,
what the *?
No!
Pitcher, you're allowed to say, * pitch!
Golf, you gotta be real quiet.
Bullshit!
Wouldn't it be great to * heckle in golf?