Actually,
you can get caught having *** with your wife.
My wife and I were going at it one afternoon
and the housekeeper walked in,
which is way better than the other way around.
It happens the other way around.
You end up saying things like,
I'll pack my *
as soon as it quits burning.
We have a great *** life, I think.
It's not like our friends.
We have these friends that are younger than us.
And they have tantric ***,
which is a yoga thing where you can have *** for hours and hours.
Yeah, we don't do that.
We did invent a ***ual position that I named
the lazy dog.
And I'll teach you how to do the lazy dog.
What you do is you get in bed there and
you get in the doggy style position.
And then both of you at the same time,
and that's the important part,
fall over.
Now you're doing the lazy dog.
I can stay in that position all night long
until she coughs.
Once she coughs me out, I'm out for the night.
There's no more lazy dog that night.
She sneezed me out one time and my own
dick hit one of my own nuts and hurt it.
And now I have difficulty interpreting her ***ual noises.
She'll be, uh, uh.
I don't know if she's about to cum or sneeze,
which makes me a nervous lover,
which causes
premature ejaculation.
Not a lot of people know that.