With my dearest...
Oh, no, *, I should explain.
Before we play this, I should explain,
this is a folk song, because we're in a folky pub,
a pub that's famous for folk music, has been for 200 years,
and this is a song which mentions melodians.
And if you don't know what a melodian is,
basically it's a squeeze box covered in buttons,
often known as Satan's typewriter.
It's an accordion for people who like to do things the hard way.
And this is a folk song, and it's a Suffolk folk song,
and it's known as Pleasant and Delightful,
but not the way I sing it.
Most of the first verse is 200 years old.
And most of the next verse is a bit newer than that,
and then it just goes downhill from there.
So please join in, and please try and drown out my singing.
Here we go. Off you go, Peter.
With my dearest darling I decided to spend
Bird watching in Suffolk a romantic weekend
We saw orcs and areas all round Linsmere Way
And the larks, they sang melodious
At the closing of the day
And the larks, they sang melodious
And the larks, they sang melodious
And the larks, they sang melodious
At the closing of the day
In a quiet country pub as I plied her with gin
The back door bust open and some folk singers come in
With banjos and fiddles and a ukulele
And the bastards played melodians
At the closing of the day
Sing it!
Yes, the bastards played melodians
And the bastards played melodians
And the bastards played melodians
At the closing of the day
Now the fiddles went diddle and the banjos went plink
And one big squeezed boxer gave my wife a wink
And she smiled right back at him just as much as to say
Won't you show me your melodion
At the closing of the day
Won't you show me your melodion
Won't you show me your melodion
Won't you show me your melodion
At the closing of the day
Now he led her to the car park, that big hairy man
And to teach her his technique he promptly began
He showed her where to push and tug and finger and play
And she squeezed his old Melodium at the closing of the day
Chorus!
And she squeezed his old Melodium
And she squeezed his old Melodium
And she squeezed his old Melodium
At the closing of the day
Now I sat there disconsolate when a sailor next to me
He blew me a kiss and put his hand on my knee
Said there's plenty more fishes
Chorus!
In the sea nowadays
Oh the larks we'd have them both of us
If you swum both ways
Oh the larks we'd have them both of us
Oh the larks we'd have them both of us
Oh the larks we'd have them both of us
If you swum both ways
We went back six times and coincidentally
We now have six children and there's none look like me
They're hairy, they're leery and suffice it to say
The bastards play melodians at the closing of the day
Yes, the bastards play melodians
And the bastards play melodians
And the bastards play melodians
At the closing of the day
She left me for the hairy man but I don't grieve or gripe
I decided that the sailor boy was much more my type
We've a bachelor residence down Alborough Way
And we play on our melodians
At the closing of the day
And we play on our melodians
And we play on our melodians
And we play on our melodians
At the closing of the day
The day