Oh
I started the year,
you turned 23
A hundred paper lanterns over the black lake
You laughed so hard the wind stole your voice
We watched them climb like slow motion
stars You said promise me every birthday,
no matter what
I swore on every light drifting south
Even if the world ends,
even if we do
I never thought the world would keep spinning
Without you in my passing just seed 100
Lanterns for the girl who isn't here
100 promises burning up the night air
I stand on the same dock,
same coat,
same ache Releasing your birthday to the sky like always
But this year the security cam caught the truth in cold white
You weren't alone,
he held the lighter You smiled at him the way you used to smile at me
And every lantern you set up
was for somebody else
I watched the grainy footage on a
loop till dawn Your hair longer now,
your laugh still the same
He cut the flame like it was fragile,
the way I used to cup your face
You counted together, 1, 2, 3 Then let them go,
like you once let me go
Soft decisive final I wonder if you told him the story
Or if you let him think it was his idea 100
Lanterns rising like lights I still believe
100 paper hearts I can't stop setting free I used to
think they carried pieces of us upward But tonight they look
like funeral boats and there you were Alive and warm,
lighting my ritual for a dead love With someone new
I should stop coming here I should let the tradition die with us
But grief is stubborn muscle memory And love is the dumbest religion
So I'll be back next August With another 100 wishes you'll never read
While you keep building new traditions with hands that aren't mine
I have 100 lanterns and not one of them knows your name
They just flow like apologies,
too late to matter
I whispered happy birthday to the dark water
It doesn't whisper back somewhere across town
You're blowing out real candles He's kissing the sugar off your lips
And every light I send into the sky is just smoke now
Just evidence that I still celebrate
you Long after you stop celebrating us
The last lantern drips out of sight I
stay until the embers die on the lake
Then I walk on past the security office
The guard nods like he knows he's seen this
Same sad movie every year
Except this year the leading lady brought a new leading man