I've met someone that makes me feel seasick Oh what a skill to have, oh what a skill to have So many skills that make her distinctive But they're not mine to have, no they're not mine Whenever she looks I read the nearest paper Though I don't care about the soaps, no I don't care about the soaps Though I'm acting like I'm in an EastEnders episode If this is a rom-com, kill the director If this is a rom-com, kill the director please Carats help us see much better in the dark Don't talk to girls, they'll break your heart This is my head and this is my spout Though they work together they can't figure anything out So with the angst of a teenage band Here's another song about a gender I'll never understand Here's another song about a gender I'll never understand If this is a rom-com, kill the director If this is a rom-com, kill the director If this is a rom-com, kill the director please This is no Bridget Jones This is no Bridget, Bridget This is no Bridget Jones This is no Bridget, Bridget This is no Bridget Jones This is no Bridget, Bridget This is no Bridget Jones This is no Bridget, Bridget This is no Bridget Jones This is no Bridget, Bridget This is no Bridget Jones This is no Bridget, Bridget This is no Bridget Jones This is no Bridget, Bridget Jones This is no Bridget Jones