We have any football fans here,
people who like the game?
only care about one person during football season,
my idol,
John Madden.
John Madden explains things in a football game you already know,
he gives you no new information
he just sits there with his NFL
skadoodle drawing circles in guys' asses
John Madden will say things in the game like,
if the quarterback,
if he throws the ball
and the receiver catches it in the end zone
then that's gonna,
then that's gonna,
then that's gonna,
then that's gonna,
then that's gonna
bow wow wow yippee yo yippee yay,
that's gonna be a touchdown
even my mom who's never watched football
in her entire life is sitting there going,
no *
couple years ago,
Troy Aikman from the Cowboys lost his contact lenses
this is what John Madden said word for word,
I couldn't make this up,
cause it's too stupid,
alright
John Madden actually said this,
here's a guy who when he puts his contacts in he can see better
anything else, Nostradamus of the end zone?
here's a guy who when he runs he goes faster
come on,
one more thing,
here's a guy who when he eats a lot he takes a big dump later
John Madden is so annoying he could drive a guy to drinking,
which explained Pat Summerall's
problem didn't it?
don't get me wrong,
I love Pat Summerall,
shame on Fox and ABC for breaking up the Burt
and Ernie of football,
Summerall had the greatest voice of all time,
never used it though,
just
did those little phrases and thanked
John Madden for everything he said,
if you played
the video game you know exactly what I'm talking about,
guy be running down the field,
Summerall
could paint a beautiful picture with the
English language but all he did was that,
do the twenty,
do the twenty five,
there's a flag on the play,
if the referee,
if he
throws the flag and he didn't make a mistake then there's probably,
there is probably gonna
be a penalty,
thanks John.