You know what's great about our leaders in Washington?Me either.It's all talk and no action.It's not greenhouse gases I'm worried about.It's those White House gas bagsbecause all their hot airis only making the globe even warmer.So now we got a big problemand a whole bunch of complainers,but only one thinker.Moi.I'm a problem thinker.I've got a problem thinking right now.It's called Operation Chill Off,which is what everyone needs to do,just chill off.That's what my mom, Pat, always says to mebecause sometimes it gets too hot in the basementfor me to sleep, but...I didn't come here tonight to talk about Patbecause she's not the boss of me right now.I came here to share great ideason how to lower temperatures around the world.Here's one.Convert to the metric system.When we convert to the metric system,temperatures will drop 50 degrees overnight.Fact.That's a scientific fact.Convert, drop, 50 degrees.Instant global colding.Oh, they got the metric system in Scandinavia.It's not hot there.Is that magic?No, it's metric, and I know the difference.I love magic.Ever since I was a little kidand my dad disappeared.Abracadab gone, just like that.But I didn't come here tonight to talk about Rick, all right?And I know what you're thinking, sir.You're thinking,I don't want to convert to the metric systembecause then we'll have a bunch of metricanscome into our land.Well, then you're a measuristand you need to chill offbecause once you go metric,you won't go back.Am I right, ladies?What are you going to do to stop them?Build a wall?A wall 1,100 kilometers wideand like nine gallons tall?Well, who do you think's going to measure that wall?You are with your yardstick?No way, Josef.A metrican is.Well, you're totally digressing the subject,Mr. Interrupter.The problemisn't metricans.It's global warming.And we,we need to save the planetso we can have a place to live.Hola.And I have a great idea for that, all right?If you,if you see someone who doesn't recycleor they keep the water onwhile they're brushing their teethor they leave all the lights on their housewhen they leave,if you see someone who does that,just don't mate with them.And that's what we're talking about.That way we can breed those traitsout of the gene pool.Don't mate,don't date,don't fornicate,don't propagate,don't copulate,don't even cop a feel, all right?Because those,those jack buttsare killing the planetmostly with,with plastic.Yeah.Did you know,40% of all plasticis used only onceand then it's gone.Waste.Yeah.That's,it's like a liberal arts degreeor something.That's like...