This year started with a little hope in the airResolutions and dreams, I had not a careWith every twist and turn I kept both hands on the reinsAnd now that the year is over, I got one thing to sayWhat the *? It's Christmas and I am out here barely hanging onWhere the * did the year go? All the phony cheer just feels so wrongI'm a gift wrapping now, trying to turn it aroundWhatever will be, will beGod, this year was kind of *, but it's a wrapGet it? It's a wrapMy boyfriend up and left me before I twink at the mallAnd I wish I could say that was the worst gift of allMy bed friend started crying, custom news in her wallShe's got jam in her watch, she's out there decking some hallsI lost my old job, need it down nowI'm stuck here folding ribbons instead of playing in snowWhat the *? It's Christmas and I am out here barely hanging onWhere the * did the year go? All the phony cheer just feels so wrongEvery bell sounding fake, all the cheer makes me acheI'm munching on last year's coalI'll drive this way until we crash, cause it's a wrapMy girlfriend says it's a season to healBut she's on vacation, so what's even real?The department store lights flicker cold and brightLike a whole bar hotel for a silent nightWhat the *?It's Christmas, this dumpster fire is swallowing me wholeHow the * did this happen?Every year I pray for some controlSo I'll tie the bow tight till the stroke of midnightTry to forget this hell of a yearHey, maybe this ain't all that bad, cause it's a wrapI'm done giving, I'm receivingThat's my chimneyWho cares if this year was *, cause it's a wrap*, I'm out of tape