I'm a Married ManWell, my wife, she sure looked pretty in her wedding gownWell, you ought to see that gal when the morning rolls aroundAnd every day for breakfast, I get coffee and burnt-up toastI done lost so much weight, I look just like a ghostI got bills by the score, I just came makin' smithAnd then comes the powder of tiny little feetAnd then comes the powder of tiny little feetAnd my budget is so doggone tight, you can hear it squeakAnd then my mother-in-law, she come to stay a six-month weekI came in the other morning about a half-past threeThat gal was a-sittin' on the porch, a-waitin' up for meI said, wait a minute, honey, and I'll explain to youAnd before that gal got on with me, both my eyes were blueAnd I said, wait a minute, honey, and I'll explain to youNow you might think that married life ain't nothin' but one big fightJust think you get to rock the young'uns in the middle of the nightAnd then you get to see your brother-in-law in jailBut that's no fun, cause you're the one who has to go his bailI'm a married manYou don't think I've always looked this wayI'm a married manThat's why I don't have too much to sayWhen I open my mouth, my wife starts to squawkI ain't spoken so long, I forgot how to talkYes, yes, yes, I'm a married man