I'm wearing the navy suit you used to love
The one you said made my eyes look honest
Ironic choice, I know
I haven't had a drink in 419 days,
not since the morning I woke up in that hotel bed
With lipstick on my collar that wasn't yours You
cried so hard you threw up in the airport parking lot
I kept saying it was only once I was blacked out
Like that made it smaller Like that made it forgivable
You said I can't forgive a mistake I can't
forgive the man who needs whiskey to cheat
Today you're walking down the aisle
In the dress you showed me on Pinter
It's 2am,
I'm in the third row Left side,
holding the invitation
I never RSVP'd to He's the one who answered when you called
Crying,
called at 3am the night I turned us into ashes
He held you together while I got sober In rooms full of strangers
Now he gets forever,
and I get to watch Smiling like a man who didn't burn the whole
world down For one stupid night in Denver
I sold the condo, paid off the debt
Built a life you begged me for
Six figures now,
clean blood,
work therapy every Thursday
I even started going to church again
Funny how clarity feels like punishment
I see you up there glowing And he looks at you like you used to look
at me Before I thought you were betrayal, feels
like
You dashed your hand at the door
Said good to see you,
son,
he doesn't know Or maybe he does and pities me anyway
The groom's cake is chocolate with raspberry filling
Exactly what we picked out before I made me past tense
You're saying adieu to the man who stayed while I became everything
I promised two ladies kissing you now and the room is cheering
I'm clapping harder than anyone Because if I stop,
my hands will shake
I sobered up,
I grew up,
I became safe And the universe laughed,
gave the ring to
the guy who was already those things When
I was busy being someone you had to leave
I keep thinking about the night you found the text you added,
was she worth it?
I said there's no one worth you
You said then why wasn't I enough?
I still don't have an answer That doesn't sound like an excuse
You're dancing now,
he's spinning you under the lights Same song we claimed as ours
I'm standing by the bar that's only serving mocktails
Because you didn't want to trigger me Even after everything,
God,
you're still protecting me
I'm out the words,
I'm sorry,
knowing you can't see Knowing it doesn't matter anymore
You found someone who never made you beg him
to be good I became good and lost you anyway
So I'll stand here sober, successful,
empty-handed Watching you marry the life I should've given you
The card on my gift says wishing you every happiness you deserve
I wrote it ten times before I stopped crying on the
ink I hope he never has to learn how fragile forever is
I hope you never have to teach him Like you taught me,
the hardest way possible
Congratulations baby,
you won I just wish winning didn't look like losing
you In a white dress, smiling at someone else