Well, there's a brand new dance everybody's trying to do
It's better than the pogo, the shimmy or the boogaloo
You can do it by yourself, but it's much more fun with two
So come on everybody, let's go nuts and screw
And this is just what you do
You've got to hide the sausage, come on and hide the sausage
It's time to hide the sausage tonight
You've got to sink the wrinkle, it's really very simple
To straighten out your wrinkle tonight
Come on, let's play mums and dads, the moon is shining bright
Come on everybody and hide the sausage tonight
Get it right out of sight
It's a dance you can do on the sofa
It's a dance you can do in the park
You can do it round the back of Sainsbury's
If you're quick and you do it when it's dark
You can do it backwards, frontwards and sideways
Provided that you're over sixteen
You can even do it standing up, I've seen it in a magazine
But you've got to be keen when you
Hide the sausage, come on and hide the sausage
It's time to hide the sausage tonight
You've got to sink the wrinkle, it's really very simple
To straighten out your wrinkle tonight
Come on, let's play mums and dads, the moon is shining bright
Come on everybody and hide the sausage tonight
Get it right out of sight
Hide that sausage, get it out of sight
Hide it to the left and hide it to the right
Hide it in the corner that Mother Nature planned
And if you cannot hide it, then hold it in your hand
Hide it somewhere safe and warm where it cannot be found
Or stick it out the window
Hide it in the corner that Mother Nature planned
And wave it all around
And don't funk till you've had enough sausage
Would you like to see my pimple-headed trouser mole?
Show the one-eyed zipper rat just where to hide his nose
Tell the pink policeman where his purple helmet goes
You can do it in a disco, you can do it in a small room
If you wear baggy trousers, you've already got the ballroom
Into the dark continent, send Dr Livingstone
Walk the SS Enterprise into the Twilight Zone
And oh look, here comes a guided muscle
To blast you in the face
To blast you into maternity
Belly to belly, toes to toes
Plant that cucumber, my goodness how it grows
The todger, the nodger, the old port walking stick
The honourable member who stands for Hampton Wick
The sausage, the banger, the roly-poly pud
Lubricate the loofah, it will make you feel so good
Hide that sausage, hide it, you won't be disappointed
If you can hide it by yourself, you must be double-jointed
Submerge the old salami, sink the submarine
Hot dogs, hot dogs, hot dogs, hot dogs

A sandwich with a wiener in between
Plunge that dipstick and get the engine cranking
It's much more fun than football and it's nearly as good as wanking
Show the bald-head ferret where the bunny rabbit's gone
But make sure he keeps his overcoat on
Well a little chipolata
That points down to your toes
Is as good as a big frankfurter
That reaches up to your nose
And if it's a wiener schnitzel
Nein, gut!
Hot dog stuffed in a bun
Or a big black pudding
Come and do it everyone
You can join in the fun, don't be a *
Just hide the sausage, come on and hide the sausage
It's time to hide the sausage tonight
You've got to sink the winkle
It's really very simple
To straighten out your wrinkle tonight
Come on, let's play mums and dads
The moon is shining bright
Come on everybody and hide the sausage tonight
Get it right out of sight
Everybody!
Hide the sausage, come on and hide the sausage
Hide the sausage, come on and hide the sausage
Let's all conceal the savalloy
Let's go barmy with the salami
Let's put the toad in the hole
Would you like to play a tune on my pork clarinet?
Get it right out of sight
I'm going crazy
Should I sweet-talk you or shall I flare up your neck, you won't hardly get my
driving sight