My father-in-law had this huge sit-down with me and my husband recently.
And he was like, hey, I want to talk to you guys about money.
You guys need to make a lot more money.
If you want to provide your children with the same kind of privileged childhood that you guys had.
I was like, why are you telling me this *?
I should not be a part of this conversation.
You tell your son that.
Man, don't you understand that I trapped your son for his earning potential?
Why else would I choose to * one person for the rest of my life?
I chose to marry him on the promise of early retirement.
And when I said I do, what I really meant was, oh, I'm done.
I'm done.
I don't want to work anymore.
And I'm not dieting anymore.
Since I got married last year, I've been eating fried chicken skin.
Every day since.
That's right.
And just fulfilling my destiny.
Which is to turn into a circle with eyelashes.
Like Mrs. Pac-Man.
Just, uh, let's redecorate.
Uh.