Girls
never do that.
You know, go to a girl's house,
like, how you doing?
Are you Kristen?
Hi Kristen, I'm Craig.
And you're Shelly?
Hi Shelly, nice to meet you.
And you're Tara?
Hi Tara, I'm Craig, nice to meet you.
Nice place you got here.
As soon as you turn your back,
there's no girl going.
Huh.
But
guys do.
You ever try to have a quiet date at home,
just watching a video,
and your drunk roommate comes home and fucks everything up?
And she starts out trying to be polite?
Hey man, what's going on?
Who are you?
Oh, I'm Craig's roommate.
Pleasure to meet you.
Dude!
Smell my finger!
Smell my finger.
Is there anything that women do is the equivalent of smell my finger?
Hey! Shelly!
How's your date with Craig tonight?
You never hear him.
I'm horny, I'm just not a dick about it.
I think, like, the worst thing about dating me,
the
worst thing about dating me is like when you wake up in the morning,
you just gotta
move fast.
If you don't want to get
jumped on.
Waking up in the morning around me is like...
I was just sharing
a moment there for a second.
Sorry about that.