Now there's a man you hear about Most any place you goAnd he's hoarding iron taxes And his name was Diamond JoeAnd he carries all his money In a diamond-studded jarAnd he never took much trouble With the process of the lawAnd I heard that Diamond Joe boys Did offer him my handAnd he gave a string of horses So all they could not standAnd I nearly stirred to death boys He did mistreat me soAnd I never saved a dollar In the pain of Diamond JoeNow his brain it was scorned, I'm sure And his meat you couldn't showNearly drove me crazy With the weight of his jawAnd the telling of his story Made them let you knowThat there never was a rounder That could line like Diamond JoeNow my friend he turns to quit him But he didn't argue soAnd now I'm still punching a kettle In the pain of Diamond JoeAnd when I'm caught up yonder And it's my time to goGive the blankets to my buddies But give the fleas to Diamond JoeDiamond Joe, Diamond Joe, Diamond Joe*