So I'm queer, and you guys are like,
no *, look at you.
I am the T in the LGBT community.
I am trans. I'm very proud of that.
And, yeah, oh, yeah.
Oh, thanks. Thank you.
I love doing shows all over the world
because you get such a range of people in the audience,
and when I tell them that I'm trans,
the first thing that happens is that their eyes
just drop to this part of my body immediately.
Everybody's trying to figure out what's going on.
Everybody's got questions and are confused.
They very often are like, wait, so, wait,
you want to be a chick?
Like, you're trans? Like, no.
Been there, done that.
And they're like, oh, so you were born a woman?
Uh, no, I was born a baby.
No.
Is anybody born a woman?
But I get proud.
I feel like I should have, like, a nylon suit on up here.
And a big T on my chest, and a cape flapping in the wind.
And a big old camel toe going on down here.
Also, people get confused.
They're like, wait a second, so does that dude have a dick?
I'm like, yes, it's just not on me right now.
It's back at the house.
I, uh, I'm a lazy packer.
So.
So.
When I was 19, I came out into the lesbian community.
Uh, I feel like I was raised in the lesbian community.
And I feel like it sounds like I was raised by wolves.
Sort of.
Uh, pretty much.
And then I had the great pleasure of coming out again
when I was 28 to my parents.
First time I came out to my parents, I said,
Mom, Dad, I like girls.
And the second time I came out to them, I said,
Mom, Dad, I still like girls, and I want to be a dude.
You can imagine how that went over.
And science is trying to figure out,
well, people like us, trans people, gender nonconformists,
nonconforming, nonbinary, whoever you are out there,
they're making studies to try to figure out
why we feel the way we do about our bodies.
You know what?
It's not science or genetics or biology.
I really want to pee my name in the snow.
And what I have isn't quite cutting it.
I mean, this would be fine if my name was
frr-frr-frr.