A gentleman, for want of a better word, who goes under the name of Ivor Biggin.
Oh, yes. I think it's probably wise that we don't really mention his record on this programme.
Not that I've ever come across him myself, of course.
Of course not. No, of course you wouldn't listen to him.
What kind of music do you like, John?
Hello, baby.
Um, yes, this is Ivor Biggin speaking.
Oh, you little bobby dazzler. Do I what?
Will I what? I'd probably do myself a mischief, but ooh, baby, you know what I like.
Chantilly lace and a pretty face and a ponytail.
A hanging down and a wiggle in a walk and a giggle in a talk.
It makes the world go round.
There ain't nothing in the world like a big-eyed girl to make me act so funny.
Make me spend my money, make me feel real loose like a long-necked goose.
Like a girl, ooh, baby, that's what I like.
Um, er, I beg your pardon.
But, but, but me bicycle's broken.
But, but, ooh, you cheeky pup.
You ought to be ashamed of yourself.
Ooh, baby, you know what I like.
Chantilly lace and a pretty face and a ponytail.
A hanging down and a wiggle in a walk and a giggle in a talk.
Ooh, mother, it makes the world go round.
There ain't nothing in the world like a big-eyed girl to make me act so funny.
Make me spend my money, make me feel real loose like a long-necked goose.
Like a girl, ooh, baby, that's what I like.
Um, er, what's that, honey?
Pick you up at eight and don't be late.
But I ain't got no money, honey.
And my mum insists that I'm in bed by half past ten.
What's that?
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!
Ooh, baby, you know what I like.
Chantilly lace and a pretty face and a ponytail.
A hanging down and a wiggle in a walk and a giggle in a talk.
Buy gum, it makes the world go round.
There ain't nothing in the world like a big-eyed girl to make me act so funny.
Make me spend my money, make me feel real loose like a long-necked goose.
Like a girl, ooh, baby, that's what I like.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.